Friday, April 10, 2020

Gray hair coming in HOT

Has anyone else had to come to grips with how much gray hair you actually have in the last few weeks? NO? Just me? Ok. I needed some color before we even went into shelter in place but a move, a job in Boston and then a complete shutdown of all no-essential services (Um that depends on who you ask) thwarted my getting into Kay’s chair in FiDI. SO here I am, easily 3 weeks past due and oh hey look at all those grays! The funny thing is it depends on where I part my hair as to how much presents itself. I have a lovely little patch right on the top of my head just past my hairline. So there will be no trendy mid parts in my foreseeable future. But if I go just a bit off center to the left you can barely see them. Although I am getting more and more around the temple, ear area so there is that.
     I don’t even so much mind my grays. Yes it signals that I am not “young” anymore, well not in the 20-30 years young, but it doesn’t make me feel OLD. I like how I feel when I’ve been freshened up. Whether thats a fresh haircut, or fun highlights or dark chocolate brown all over or even that one time I put fire engine red streaks in. Hair is an easy thing to change when you feel it in your bones that you need to make a change but aren’t ready to jump off that cliff you’re standing on. It always make me feel like I am in control of something when my life feels out of control. I am notorious for finding a style I like in a magazine, on Pinterest, in an elevator (yes I snapped a pick of a girl's hair I liked in an elevator once) and bringing it to my stylist and saying “let’s do this”. The stylists who have tried to talk me out of it haven’t lasted long, but the ones who know I mean it when I say “it’s fine it will grow back” and go with it, I’ve had long working relationships with. It’s just hair for crying out loud. I’ve never understood the women who have the same haircut for most of their life. We all change and grow over the years and I feel like my hair is a part of who I am and speaks to each time in my life in a way.
     I had not had short hair in years because my Was-Band preferred long hair, at least on me he did, so I kept it long while we were together. But you better believe when I filed for divorce one of the first stops was my stylist's chair and within hours I had a short piecey blonde streaked chin length bob by the end of the afternoon and I absolutely LOVED it. It was exactly what I wanted. Just the type of F-U a major breakup requires. I’ve had one or two cuts over the years that while cute just didn’t quite feel like “me” but I don’t regret them. Regret is too big a word for a dang haircut. They grow out, you try something you see on someone else, you find one you like and play with variations on that for a while and then move onto something new and different. At least that’s how I do it. Thats how I do a lot of my life. 
     Right now my hair is long and while I love it long, I don’t have the energy to actually style it that regularly, especially right now when even though we aren’t really doing a whole lot with our days, the emotional weight of the situation just sucks the life out of me. I’m keeping up with my workouts to keep my sanity so the idea of having to blow dry my hair after a shower each day is not that appealing. Although I am sure the messy bun I seem to sport each day is more of testament to my not feeling my best than the grays we started this story with. I think I was really looking forward to getting some lighter pieces put in on my next appointment to usher in the warmer weather I was sure was coming.  Now I am all about learning how to do new things and yes I did watch a Youtube video so I could give Scott a trim but one thing I will not do is color my own hair. I have cut my own bangs before to my own surprised success but I have good hair and I, in no want to destroy it by screwing up with color. Highlights are especially tricky as I have warm, orangey undertones and if you don’t strip that stuff to blonde, I hate how it turns out. There is a very fine line between orange and white blonde and fried. No thank you…..I will work on my patience and get by with a little help from my friend root spray. 


It's coming. Slowly but surely. Waking from a long slumber to bloom brightly once again. 

Who else looks forward to sitting together at tables like these?

Tuesday, February 25, 2020

The two faces of running

This is basically my two faces of running. Super happy, having a great time, enjoying every minute and gutting it out through the hard miles, having a great time, enjoying every minute. Just because it's hard doesn't mean you can't enjoy the moment. Sometimes the hard is the best part. You can surprise yourself. I read a quote today that said "your body is in better shape than your mind thinks." It's so true. Your mind will tell you to quit long before your body really needs to quit. Isn't that true in life as well. How about today you tell your mind to SHHHHHHH and just go for it, whatever that is for you.⁠⠀

5 Freaking 0

Haaaaa I wrote this in September and apparently forgot I had tried to get into the NY marathon last year. Well I didn't forget but I didn't get in so I let it simmer for a few more months. And now it's the end of February and I'm 5 weeks away from Paris. WOW! I've been training and reading about training and doing lots of recovering because.....50. But PARIS IS 5 WEEKS AWAY!!! I'm getting so excited!! 

"I'm turning 50 this year. It's such a weird statement to make because I don't feel half a century old. Not even on my tough days do I feel almost 50. But it's a milestone birthday so naturally I have people asking me "what are you doing for your 50th?" I've gone back and forth between a big party in NYC with family and friends to trips to Morocco and Italy and everywhere in between. The only problem is that my birthday is on December 29th and this is the first year in 49 that being born on that day has caused me stress. I never minded it even though its right between Christmas and New Years and I never got to have a party at school because we were always on vacation. My mom was always great about keeping it a separate event from Christmas so I never felt lost in the holiday shuffle. But in trying to decide how to celebrate the Big 5-0 I determined that ⁠
A. NYC is expensive, in December especially, so people won't come.⁠
B. People want to be with their families on holidays, so that ruled out a trip. ⁠
What if you throw a party and nobody comes? Not even the two people who got you here in the first place...ouch. ⁠
SO, instead I registered to run the Paris Marathon in April of 2020. It's been on my proverbial Bucket List for 15 years, thwarted by a foot surgery in 2007. I am going to push this 50 year old body to run the streets of Paris for 26.2 miles and all the miles it will take to get me there. It's been a while since I pushed my physical and mental limits and it is time. So here's to the 5 (freaking) 0, I'm coming for you."