Has anyone else had to come to grips with how much gray hair you actually have in the last few weeks? NO? Just me? Ok. I needed some color before we even went into shelter in place but a move, a job in Boston and then a complete shutdown of all no-essential services (Um that depends on who you ask) thwarted my getting into Kay’s chair in FiDI. SO here I am, easily 3 weeks past due and oh hey look at all those grays! The funny thing is it depends on where I part my hair as to how much presents itself. I have a lovely little patch right on the top of my head just past my hairline. So there will be no trendy mid parts in my foreseeable future. But if I go just a bit off center to the left you can barely see them. Although I am getting more and more around the temple, ear area so there is that.
I don’t even so much mind my grays. Yes it signals that I am not “young” anymore, well not in the 20-30 years young, but it doesn’t make me feel OLD. I like how I feel when I’ve been freshened up. Whether thats a fresh haircut, or fun highlights or dark chocolate brown all over or even that one time I put fire engine red streaks in. Hair is an easy thing to change when you feel it in your bones that you need to make a change but aren’t ready to jump off that cliff you’re standing on. It always make me feel like I am in control of something when my life feels out of control. I am notorious for finding a style I like in a magazine, on Pinterest, in an elevator (yes I snapped a pick of a girl's hair I liked in an elevator once) and bringing it to my stylist and saying “let’s do this”. The stylists who have tried to talk me out of it haven’t lasted long, but the ones who know I mean it when I say “it’s fine it will grow back” and go with it, I’ve had long working relationships with. It’s just hair for crying out loud. I’ve never understood the women who have the same haircut for most of their life. We all change and grow over the years and I feel like my hair is a part of who I am and speaks to each time in my life in a way.
I had not had short hair in years because my Was-Band preferred long hair, at least on me he did, so I kept it long while we were together. But you better believe when I filed for divorce one of the first stops was my stylist's chair and within hours I had a short piecey blonde streaked chin length bob by the end of the afternoon and I absolutely LOVED it. It was exactly what I wanted. Just the type of F-U a major breakup requires. I’ve had one or two cuts over the years that while cute just didn’t quite feel like “me” but I don’t regret them. Regret is too big a word for a dang haircut. They grow out, you try something you see on someone else, you find one you like and play with variations on that for a while and then move onto something new and different. At least that’s how I do it. Thats how I do a lot of my life.
Right now my hair is long and while I love it long, I don’t have the energy to actually style it that regularly, especially right now when even though we aren’t really doing a whole lot with our days, the emotional weight of the situation just sucks the life out of me. I’m keeping up with my workouts to keep my sanity so the idea of having to blow dry my hair after a shower each day is not that appealing. Although I am sure the messy bun I seem to sport each day is more of testament to my not feeling my best than the grays we started this story with. I think I was really looking forward to getting some lighter pieces put in on my next appointment to usher in the warmer weather I was sure was coming. Now I am all about learning how to do new things and yes I did watch a Youtube video so I could give Scott a trim but one thing I will not do is color my own hair. I have cut my own bangs before to my own surprised success but I have good hair and I, in no want to destroy it by screwing up with color. Highlights are especially tricky as I have warm, orangey undertones and if you don’t strip that stuff to blonde, I hate how it turns out. There is a very fine line between orange and white blonde and fried. No thank you…..I will work on my patience and get by with a little help from my friend root spray.